Fish out of Water

When I was on a boat last weekend I saw a fish washed up on shore, flopping around and gasping for breath. It was the strangest thing, it seemed as if he could have flopped back into the water, but instead he went away from the water and towards a Chipotle burrito that someone leftover from a picnic. There are two reasons why this fish didn’t survive. First, fish were made to be in the water. In the water fish have the freedom to move around, eat, and breath, but when separated they can do nothing. Second, the fish reached for a burrito which, although it is the tastiest thing on the planet, could not give him life. He needed to be in the water before enjoying that tortilla filled with Mexican goodness.

What was the point of that story? Well, we are that fish. Ever since Adam sinned we have been kicked out of Eden, separated from our God and source of life. And in this fallen world there are a lot of things that promise to give us life and hope. Promise to satisfy us. For example, I looked for satisfaction in football and lost every game my senior year. I’ve put my hope in dating relationships and none of those relationships lasted. I’ve been disappointed in food from expensive restaurants. I tried finding identity in being handsome and got staph infection on my face. I tried to please people and make everybody happy, but still made people upset. A flood once ruined my neighborhood. Money and jobs can be lost at the drop of a hat, and family members and friends will pass away someday. Everything in this world that we look to for our identity and satisfaction can and will fail us because we are trying to make them do what only God can. God spoke through Jeremiah saying, “My people have committed a double evil: They have abandoned me, the fountain of living water, and dug cisterns for themselves, cracked cisterns that cannot hold water” (Jeremiah 2:13). Jesus says in John’s Gospel, “Whoever drinks from the water that I will give him will never get thirsty again– ever! In fact, the water I will give him will become a well of water springing up within him for eternal life” (John 4:14). Only Jesus can satisfy our souls. It is only through Jesus that we can find an identity that can never be taken away: sons and daughters of God.

To clarify, I am not saying sports, relationships, and possessions are bad things. Much to the contrary, they are good gifts that should be enjoyed within God’s boundaries. Paul tells Timothy, “For everything created by God is good, and nothing should be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, since it is sanctified by the word of God and prayer” (1 Tim 4:4-5). However, there is a big difference between enjoying God’s gifts and turning the gifts into gods. Again, Paul says, “They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served something created instead of the Creator, who is blessed forever” (Romans 1:25). The temptation to put our hope in something or someone that is not God is ever before us, but like the fish may we strive to drink from the fountain of living water and enjoy the Chipotle burrito beneath the waterfall of Christ’s love and grace.

Knowledge vs Love

In 1 Corinthians 8:1 Paul says, “Knowledge inflates with pride, but love builds up.” An image that helps me put this verse into perspective is Spongebob Squarepants, or should I say Musclebob Buffpants. In this episode Spongebob purchases inflatable arms to impress people who lift at the beach.

Muscle Arms SpongeBob Guide: MuscleBob BuffPants - The Sponge Bob Club

Spongebob is adored by everyone, but there is a problem: he is no stronger than he was before he got the arms. He was all look but no substance.

I was a lot like SpongeBob when I first became a Christian, and am tempted to be that again. I felt a lot of pride in knowing more about God than everybody else. I thought my holiness was based on what I knew. I wanted to show people how “good” of a Christian I was by how well I knew my Bible. The problem was my knowledge didn’t make me love God and people more. I probably looked better than I actually was. And as I’m in grad school learning more about the Bible I have to ask myself, “Am I here to learn a lot and impress people, or am I here to be better equipped to serve the Church and love God more deeply?” If it’s the former I become like SpongeBob, puffing myself up but staying spiritually in the same place. But if it’s the latter, both the Church and my spirit are strengthened.

Consider the Pharisees. They knew more about God’s law than anybody, yet neglected justice, mercy, and faith (Matthew 23:23). Christians, as we strive to know more about God may it not be at the expense of intimately knowing and loving God. As we learn may we not puff ourselves up, thinking we are better because we are aware of theological concepts, but rather strengthen our character and build up the Church as we are conformed to the image of Christ. May God humble us, give us courage to be honest about the state of our hearts, and grant us grace to persevere as we struggle to love Him with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength.

Hot Rod and Israel

Underneath the ridiculousness, slapstick humor, hilarious quotes, the movie Hot Rod actually addresses some deep struggles that I believe all men have. Throughout the movie amateur stuntman Rod Kimble (Andy Samberg) performs/fails ridiculous stunts with his crew. Essentially the plot is Rod doing stunts in order to raise money to fund a huge jump (15 buses.. One more than Evel Knievel jumped, I know cause I checked. Online.) for a heart transplant to save his dying stepdad. However, Rod wants to save Frank in order to beat him in a fight and thus earn Frank’s love and respect, which he cannot do if Frank dies (Maybe he should’ve thought of that before he sucked at being a man all his life). When his step-brother Kevin asks Rod why he has to fight Frank Rod tells him, “You wouldn’t understand, Kevin. He’s your real dad, so he automatically loves you. He’s my stepdad. I have to earn it.” Also, Rod believed his biological father to be a stuntman, so he then does stunts to honor his memory. This movie is all about a young man struggling to become a man and earn the blessing and validation from his stepdad.

Rod’s story reminds me the biblical story of Jacob. Jacob also struggled his whole life for validation of his identity as a man and he did not receive it from his father. Genesis 25 tells us that Isaac loved Jacob’s twin brother Esau because he was a big hairy hunter, while hairless Jacob (“You know I have a hormone disorder!!”) was a quiet man who stayed at home. Isaac’s favoritism for Esau deeply wounded Jacob. Jacob was constantly struggling with Esau, even from birth, for who would be the future leader of the family. Jacob convinced Esau to give up his inheritance for a bowl of soup, and he also tricked Isaac into giving him the blessing meant for Esau. Pastor Tim Keller believes Jacob stole the blessing because “Jacob, even under false pretenses, longed to hear his father say, ‘I delight in you more than anyone else in the world!’ Jacob’s life had been one long wrestling match to get blessing.” (Counterfeit Gods, 158) Since he didn’t have his father’s love Jacob looked for validation in a woman, Rachel. The price for her hand in marriage was 7 years of service, upon which her father deceitfully gave Leah, Rachel’s older sister, to Jacob, and required another 7 years to marry Rachel as well.

The climax of Jacob’s life comes the night before he was to meet Esau and his army. We are told that a man wrestled with Jacob until daybreak. A man so strong that he dislocated Jacob’s hip just by touching it.  Jacob told the man that he would not let him go unless he blessed him. The man told him, “You will no longer be Jacob, it will be Israel because you have struggled with God and with men and have prevailed.” Jacob then said, “I have seen God face to face and have been delivered.” At some point that night Jacob realized he was wrestling with God, and rather asking him to let go so he doesn’t die, Jacob did the opposite and clung to him. Jacob received a new name. He was no longer defined by his struggle, but by his victory. This reminds me of the final scene in Hot Rod where Rod is fighting Frank and holding him in an armbar saying, “Tell me I’m a man, Frank! Say it!” Frank then smiled at him and said, “You’re a man, son.”

I think in all men there is a desire to hear their father say they are proud of them. We long for validation. We want to know we are enough and have what it takes. I think it is important to receive this validation from our earthly fathers, but ultimately the validation that matters most is from our heavenly father. Hebrews 2:11 says, “For the one who sanctifies (Jesus) and those being sanctified (believers in Jesus) all have one father. That is why he is not ashamed to call them brothers.” Paul also says that we are co-heirs with Christ because we have the same father. We did not earn this identity. Rather it was given to us through Christ’s death on the cross. He took our sin and gave us his righteousness. So the Father no longer sees our sin on us, it has all been defeated on the cross. Now all he sees is Christ’s holiness. We receive the same blessing the Father gave to Jesus at his baptism, “This is my beloved son with whom I am well pleased.” Christian, rest in the fact that we don’t have to win a fight to be sons and daughters of God. It’s all by grace.

Here is the final fight scene from Hot Rod 🙂 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKxbL8Sh8mU

The Good News of “The Sandlot”

If you know me you probably know that I really enjoy movies. If you know me well you probably know that “The Sandlot” is one of my favorite movies of all time and that I can pretty much quote the entire thing. Needless to say that I was super excited that on the 700th time of watching this movie I saw a really good picture of the Gospel of Christ. If you have never seen  The Sandlot, shame on you (jk), but spoilers alert.

In The Sandlot, new kid Scott Smalls learns how to play baseball and also gets himself and his friends into an unexpected adventure. One day team leader Benny “The Jet” Rodriguez busts the guts out of the baseball and is upset that they can’t play anymore. Smalls, not wanting to stop the fun, claims he can get a ball from home. So he goes home and grabs his stepdad’s baseball, signed by Babe Ruth, and then hits it over the fence into the clutches of “The Beast”. Smalls and the team try everything they can think of to recover the ball from the beast. They even build a robot! But no matter how hard they try they cannot get the ball from the Beast. All hope seemed lost. Smalls even says that his life is over. It was then that Benny understood that this was his opportunity to do something great, to hop the fence, challenge the Beast, and get the ball back. Benny describes the Beast as, “A giant gorilla-dog thing, that ate one kid already.” As Benny prepares to hop the fence everyone is telling him not to do it and that it is suicide. Smalls says, “Benny, it was my fault. You don’t have to do this!” To which Benny responded, “Yeah I do, Smalls. I have to do this.” Long story short, Benny hops the fence, looks the beast in the eye, gets the ball and starts an epic chase scene with the Beast.When Benny gets the best of the Beast, he becomes the team mascot. How does this relate to Jesus?

Smalls taking the ball is like Adam and Eve taking the fruit in the Garden of Eden, and hitting it over the fence is like the fall. When Adam and Eve sinned they cause a separation between mankind and a holy God. So think of the Babe Ruth ball as our soul. Because of our sinful nature it is separated from God and is in the territory of a “beast”. Although we as mankind try everything to bring our souls back to God by our own strength and wit, ultimately we come up short, much like how the team couldn’t get the ball back. The only way they could get the ball back was for Benny to risk his life, hop the fence, and look death in the eye. Similarly, the only way we get our heart/soul back is when Jesus came down to earth, died on the cross, and resurrected. Benny didn’t just hop over the fence, he emerged victorious with the Babe Ruth ball. Jesus didn’t just die on the cross, he rose victoriously. Benny defeated the beast and ultimately tamed him so that he was the team mascot. By his resurrection Christ defeated death and we are able to say, “Death has been swallowed up in victory. Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?” Although The Sandlot it a great movie, it is just a shadow of an even better story: Christ coming to bring hope and new life to mankind.

Great Faith?

It’s not the size of our faith that matters, but it is much more important who or what you put your faith in. Let me explain by way of a story.

There are two men who need to get across a great divide, say the Grand Canyon. Each man gets to pick one animal to carry them across. The first man grabs his animal and runs and jumps over the edge. The second man is trembling, inching his way towards the edge. With much fear and hesitation, he finally scoots himself off the edge. Who had the greater faith? Obviously man number one, right? However, there is one important detail I left out: what animal did they choose? Man number one chose a hummingbird while man number two had one of the giant eagles from Lord of the Rings. Although man number one displayed great faith, he put his faith in something that could not bring him to the promised land, so to speak. And although man two had very little faith, he put what faith he did have in a mighty creature who was very capable of completing the task.

There are times in my life when I am like both of these men. Sometimes I put my faith in friends or sports or my education and think my happiness and satisfaction comes from those things. In these moments I am the first man. Great faith, but in the wrong god. Other times I am like man two, doubting God, not trusting his promises, afraid that he won’t provide for me. It’s in these moments when I finally step off the ledge when I realize how big God is and how foolish I am not to trust him. I guess that’s why all you need is faith the size of a mustard seed to move mountains, because our God is so great.

I hope this analogy challenges and encourages. If you are like man one, putting your hope and worth in things that aren’t Christ (significant others, sports, good looks, good deeds) repent and come to the only one who can bring true happiness. If you are like man two, take heart and rejoice that our salvation is not determined by the size of our faith, rather it is in Jesus Christ dying for our sins and resurrecting to ensure our debt has been paid. I know most of us wish we had greater faith, and that is a good thing to want. But also know that God is a good God and will use your small faith to do mighty things.

I guess my prayer is the same that the man in Mark 9 told Jesus, “I believe; help my unbelief!” Abba, I believe my sins are forgiven. I know I am your son and you will never leave me; but help me when I think I am too broken for you to want me. I believe you will provide for me financially, but help my unbelief. I believe you have given me the power to change the world through your Holy Spirit, but help me when I feel like I can do nothing when faced with the seemingly insurmountable brokenness in the world. May you increase and me decrease. Amen!

Dad, I’m Done!

Full disclosure: This post contains relatively explicit references to fecal material.. Sorry, not sorry.

“But God sent his son… to redeem those under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons/daughters. And because you are sons/daughters, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba, Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son; and if a son, then an heir through God.” Galatians 4:4-7.

When I was a little kid, somewhere between potty training and being able to handle my business all by myself, there was a period in my life when I didn’t know how to wipe my backside. So, when I was finished going number 2 I would call out from the toilet, “Daaaad, I’m done!” Which was his cue to come in and clean up my butt. Why did my dad do this? Because he loves me and knew that I was at a point in life where if I tried to do it myself there would be literally be poop everywhere. (Thanks, Dad!!) And for me, I called to my dad in confidence. I knew he would come in and help me out. I knew he wasn’t going to yell at me or shame me for not knowing how to wipe myself. This is the confidence I want to have when I cry out to Abba, Father.

I know there are people who are struggling with sin and really feel the shame and guilt that comes with it. You might feel dirty and think, “I need to clean myself up before coming to God.” So you try to wipe yourself, get yourself clean all on your own, not realizing that you are just making a bigger mess. “God proves His own love for us in this way, while we were still sinners Christ dies for us!” Romans 5:8. When we were at our worst, our messiest, covered in the stink of sin, Christ died to forgive us of our sins. Not only that, when we turn to Him in faith we receive an adoption into God’s family. I know my dad loves me, but he is not perfect and his love can never match the love from my heavenly Father. So, if my dad was willing to hear me, come to me, and clean me up when I was covered in poop, how much more will God the Father? He is truly the only one capable of cleaning up our sins. Stop trying to fix yourself by your own strength. You aren’t strong enough. Don’t be afraid of calling out to God in the midst of your messiness. God delights in you and loves when you call to him. Even in your brokenness and messiness. If you are in Christ, you are God’s child. He will not leave you, shame you, or abandon you, even if you feel like there is no way he can still love you.. He does. He proved it when Jesus died for you.

So my prayer is very similar to  what it was as a child. “Dad, Abba, Father. I’m done. I’m done with this mess I’m in. I’m done trying to clean myself. Abba, wash away my guilt and cleanse my from my sin. Create a clean heart for me and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Thank you,  Jesus for dying for me even though I’m a sinner. And thank you for adopting me into your family. Remind me always that my identity is in you and I am not defined by the mess I might find myself in. Amen!

 

Parents and Sports

Although I am no longer in South Africa I’m going to continue to use this blog as a vessel from which I can throw my thoughts into cyberspace. The topic of discussion for today is parents and sports, specifically how parents should approach sports with their kids. I have both seen and experienced for myself loved ones holding unrealistic expectations for their kids. Adults may feel angry when their child messes up on the field or court, scream at the kid, or endlessly critique the player when they get home from the game. Here are a few thoughts in response to these people: 1. the kids probably don’t want to hear from you about how they messed up. 2. You probably aren’t doing anything except looking ridiculous. 3. How well your kid does is not a reflection of your parenting skills. 4. Players are going to mess up. That’s life.

1.Here is the nature of sports: when you mess up you know about it and probably feel worse than anyone. The last thing a player wants to do when they get home is relive again and again how they messed up. They know how they messed up, and you lecturing them is not going to make the problem go away or make them a better player. Really all a player wants from their loved ones is for them to say they are proud of them and that they enjoy watching them play. For example, when I played basketball in high school one game I had 35 points but had a rough time with free throws. There were some people who were like, “Good job, now you just need to learn to shoot free throws.” Why did they need to say that? I didn’t want to hear it and it definitely didn’t help me shoot free throws. It was exhausting trying to live up to all of these expectations people had for me that I couldn’t accomplish. I’ll end this point by saying kids shouldn’t dread talking to loved ones after a game. A home should be a safe haven where kids can get away from all the people talking negatively about them, not a source for more anxiety and questions of self-worth.

2. As I alluded to in the previous point, parental critiques are not helpful. I’m sure the coach has already talked to the player about the mistake, so you’re really just beating a dead horse by saying it again. Also, I’ve heard some very unintelligent advice in my life. For example, “Make your free throws!” “Stop turning it over!” “Tackle better!” “Come on!” These are not constructive. The player will never say, “Oh, I see. Since you told me to make my free throws now I will never miss.” No. That’s not how it works. Screaming at your kid during a game might make you feel better, but trust me it is not making them play better. If anything it is making them more nervous about letting you down. So be careful what you say, you just might be sounding foolish and hurtful.

3. Parents, your child’s performance cannot determine your joy and identity. If your kid plays poorly you are not going to be the laughingstock of the town. Your parenting skills are not the reason why your child had a good or bad game. I see this especially with fathers, where they see their son or daughter as a reflection of themselves. They like puffing out their chest saying, “That’s my boy, or that’s my girl”. Really they are thinking, “My kid is better than yours.” Its kind of like when little kids say, “My dad can beat up your dad.” And there is a great deal of pride in that statement, and boy! do men hate having their pride challenged. But think about how much pressure that puts on the player and the damage that can cause. The player is playing for a lot of people: the coach, the team, the school, etc. They know that if they mess up they could potentially get yelled at by the coach, they might upset their teammates, and kids at school might give them a hard time about it. That’s a lot of stuff! They don’t need to add in the fear of letting their parents down to the mix.  I understand that everyone wants their kids to be successful, but there must be some deep insecurities if their worth as a parent is shaken by their child’s performance in a sporting event.

4. This might come as a shock, but players make mistakes. I can’t think of any player in history who did everything exactly perfect in a game. So expecting your kid to do everything correctly is an unrealistic and absurd expectation. The question then is how can parents react when things go poorly? A key thing would be to not bring up the negatives, especially if you don’t also mention the positives. Imagine a parent watching their child in a concert and after the show going up to them and saying, “Man, you really butchered that C note.” You would probably think that that parent is very rude and inconsiderate of the effort they put into the show. So why is it different in sports? After a concert it is expected that you tell them good job, you enjoyed watching them perform, and you can tell that they worked hard. I don’t think it should be any different after a sporting event. Kids should enjoy playing the sport, and parents should enjoy watching them have fun. I’m not saying that we shouldn’t care about winning or performance. Those are important, but they shouldn’t be more important than the relationship that you have with your loved one.

I’ll end with a question. At the end of the day what is more important: that your kid performs well in their sport, or that your kid knows that you love and are proud of them, and that their performance on the field doesn’t determine how much you love them?

Stay tuned for my next post about how Jesus restores these broken relationships.

Back Home

I have been back in America for about a month now and have finally settled back in to life in Minnesota. I don’t think it is possible for me to summarize or accurately express what the time spent in South Africa has meant to me and my faith journey. This past summer was perhaps the most challenging summer of my life, but it was also the best summer I’ve ever had. God revealed Himself to me in ways I have never seen before, and the way I see Him and other people has changed a lot. I have a love for God and people that wasn’t as strong before I left. I understand that I don’t have to perform for God to earn His love, but he is pleased with me because I am His son. I see that there is no guilt in life because Jesus died on the cross and paid the price for all of my sins. I will never be perfect, and I’ve accepted that there is no sense making others think otherwise. Those are some of the things God has shown me. God is good!!

Thank you all for reading these posts, for the prayers, and the financial support many have provided. This experience would not have been possible without all of you. I’ll conclude with a video that paints a nice picture of what our tennis team was like.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F6OgIbtX59w

Enjoy and God bless!

Craven Week

The past week five of us guys left out Impact team to join other guys who would serve as chaperones during Craven Week. Craven week is the biggest U-18 rugby tournament in South Africa where twenty all-star teams from around the country come and play three games over the course of a week. As chaperones we were each assigned a team, and our job was essentially to serve the team in any way that we could to help things run more smoothly and also build relationships with the intention of being a spiritual leader for the guys. My team was the Limpopo Blue Bulls. They are from the northeastern part of the country. The majority of the players were farmers and hunters, guys I could relate to being from Missouri Valley. I noticed that my team was often racially segregated. In the dorms most of the white players were on the first floor, and the black players were on the second floor. This was also the case at meals. It was a little difficult for me to make sure i was hanging out with everyone on the team when they were so often separated.  But overall my team was super cool. They were always cracking jokes and wrestling with each other, I speak that language well. The language I don’t speak well if Afrikaans, which was team’s language, and they didn’t like using English unless they had to. In spite of the language barrier I was able to connect with the guys on multiple levels. I was able to have some deep conversions with a few guys, and by the end of the week I knew they accepted me as one of them. On the last day the team manager gave me a picture of the team and a few of the guys asked me want why I wasn’t in it. That moment was pretty special for me. Craven week was definitely a highlight of my trip. God challenged me on a lot of ways, but he also worked through me in a lot of ways. I definitely think I was in my element. Oh and I also learned a lot about rugby! I hope to play it when I get back to the states.

We are now on the last leg of our trip. We have finished with most of our outreaches and are now in the re-entry phase, learning how to deal with coming home. We are also working on our ministry plans and putting on paper what God is calling us to. That is a daunting, but exciting task. Thank you all for the prayers and support you have shown me. I truly wouldn’t be where I am without you all.

God bless

image

image

First Camp

So this weekend marked the end of our training and we were finally able to put what we learned this past month into practice. With only a day to plan the camp, we hosted about 40 South African children between the ages of 10-14. I was a huddle leader with 7 kids in my huddle. This was one of the most challenging experiences because my kids, in general, were pretty difficult. Most of them didn’t want to participate, they were often way to cool to do anything, and there was a language barrier to deal with. For a lot of the huddle time they would joke with each other on their own language. But overall it was an awesome experience because the patience and perseverance I had during camp could only have come from God. Also, when I got frustrated when the kids wouldn’t listen to me I remembered all the times that I didn’t listen to God, so it gave me a greater understanding of God’s love, and was humbled.

image

image

image

Today was our Sabbath day so me and give other bros climbed all the way to the top of Stellenbosch mountain. The journey was difficult, but I felt so much peace when we got to the top..

image

And the view was unreal. We have more camps coming up and I’m really excited for what God is going to teach me.